Update: Junior Year is OVER

I literally could not be happier that this school year is over. Not that I don’t love going to UF or that junior year was the worst (looking @ you, sophomore year), I just need a break. This year has been full of ups and downs and cry sessions and way too many trips to Starbucks and I even changed my Instagram theme three times, so yeah...

Junior year has been real, it’s been fun, but it hasn’t been real fun.

Friendships have expiration dates 

I know, I know. It’s kind of a sad thing to think about, but friendships do end. And sometimes it’s for the better. I went into this year with friendships that I didn’t make it out of junior year with..

AND THAT IS OKAY.

Honestly, I was in friendships that were negatively affecting me. I didn’t realize it until drama crept in and resulted in less than happy outcomes.

Remember ladies, boys come and go, so don’t throw away a friendship over a boy!!! I’ve learned that you have to surround yourself with people that support you and positively impact your life. Like my mama always said, “unhappy people want to make everyone around them unhappy.”
So, I had to look at my friendships and see if I was happy in them. And it sucked to have to admit to myself that I was being negatively impacted by people I had been so close with. I had shared things with these people that they could use against me.
But I had to walk away from those toxic friendships. It’s not easy, but I’m a lot better off for it.

These are my people!!!

Stop putting emphasis on people 

My mama also taught me that you cannot find happiness or fulfillment in a person. Whether that’s a boyfriend or a friendship...people will always disappoint, whether they mean to or not. We are not perfect and we shouldn’t put that kind of pressure on people. Jesus is the only one that can fulfill our lives and give us purpose. To try to put that on a particular person is unfair and will lead to disappoint, or even resentment.

I learned this not only in my friendships, but also in my almost relationships. A guy is not going to complete me, no matter how many cheesy rom-coms I watch. I have to find that kind of fulfillment in my relationship with Christ. So while I did not find a boyfriend this school year, I am happy about it. I’ve got to work on myself and develop a strong foundation with the Lord before He lets a wonderful, Jesus-loving, selfless boy into my life.

Doors close for a reason 

Aside from friendships ending or the lack of relationships in my life, junior year was a year of closed doors. Last year I battled changing my major and completely reworking my college career. This year I applied, interviewed, and ran for positions that didn’t happen. The biggest being in my sorority.
If you didn’t know, I served on my sorority’s executive committee last year. I thought the Lord was calling me to serve in a much larger capacity. So I ran for president.

Currently, I am not Phi Mu’s president, so you can guess how that turned out.
I went from waking up to 25+ emails in my exec inbox to not being a part of Phi Mu’s exec in a day. Yeah it sucked for a couple days. I felt like a failure. I felt like the Lord had led me to something that I wasn’t supposed to go for. But I’m glad I did.

I’ll never wonder what would have happened if I didn’t run. That closed door wasn’t the best at the time. Trust me, I had a lot of resentment for Phi Mu at that time, but it turned out to be such a big blessing. Because Phi Mu was finally not my job anymore, I could enjoy it in the capacity it was meant to be enjoyed in. I got to join other clubs with my free time.

One club actually led me to my current internship. If I had won the presidency, I wouldn’t have joined this particular club, and I wouldn’t have heard my current boss speak at a meeting. That closed door allowed me to walk towards an open one. One that I am so so very grateful for. This internship has been such a bright spot in my life and I honestly love going to work. I get to spend my summer continuing this internship and I couldn’t imagine spending 20 hours a week anywhere else. That resentment turned into thankfulness. I love Phi Mu, but I love it even more now that I don’t have to treat it like a job and I can enjoy my actual job.

So yeah. 

Junior year has been a complete whirlwind and I honestly wouldn’t want it any other way. I have one year left, but I’m ready to close this chapter of my life and gear up for the wonderful future I know the Lord has in store for me.

ALSO: I’ve created a editorial calendar for myself so that I can actually be a decent blogger!!!! Let me know how your school year went in the comments below!

Oh, and if you want to see anything on the blog, please let me know! I’m hoping for 1-2 posts a week this summer now that I time to devote to blogging!!!